Summer Christmas Special…
In last month’s captivating issue of the Painter’s Rag, we announced our super-cool summer special, Christmas In July! And Part Of August! You’ll recall (won’t you?) that we were offering a TREMENDOUS bargain for folks who schedule their fine residential painting project NOW (-ish), to be completed in December, just in time for holiday merrymaking. Well, our December schedule is filling so fast, and the special was so popular, we’ve EXTENDED it now through August and at least part of September! So if you’d like a fresh coat of love at your place for the holidays… with a discount of at least 15% on projects of $1,500 or more (and an even better discount on larger jobs)… the time to call is now.
Merry Christmas! Now in July, August, and at least part of September!
Your House Could Use A Vacation
… Why Not Have It Beautified While You’re Away?
The Painter’s Rag:
Monthly Wit And Wisdom
From Your Friendly And Professional Fine Painting Company
As summer begins to wind down, and the late-summer/early-autumn vacation season kicks into high gear, your house is sitting there all lonely and stuff while you and the family are out riding the thrill rides of life.
While you’re away on vacation, what do you imagine your house might be doing?
- Sneaking off to House Island for a vacation of its own, being magically animated and lifted away on the warm summer breeze and making it back JUST in time to ensure you never find out your house could… afford an island vacation?
- Worrying every hour that it forgot to do something it should’ve done for you, right about the same time every hour that you worry about possibly forgetting to turn off the stove?
- (You didn’t forget. The stove is cool as a cucumber.)
- Inviting all its friends over for a raucous house party while you’re not there to scold it?
- Taking naps in the middle of the day, and hitting the red wine a bit too often out of sheer boredom?
- Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo?
- (This is very dangerous behavior. If you find out your house is watching Captain Kangaroo, contact a house psychiatrist or psychic energy healer ASAP.)
Well, we here at Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company can’t say for certain what your house is doing while you’re away on vacation.
Unless, that is, you’ve engaged our services for that time! In which case, while you’re away at the spa, your house is actually enjoying a few spa days of its own.
Yes, while you’re away on vacation, it’s the PERFECT time to have the expert pros at Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company apply a fresh coat of love to your home.
From staining the wood surfaces…
… To beautifying the walls with paper, paint, or fancy textures…
… To spiffing-up your house’s exterior so amazingly that you won’t even recognize it when you get home and may actually have unloaded several suitcases into your neighbor’s garage before you realize your error…
… Yes, the Imhoff professional painting family can do it all.
And you don’t even need to be there!
In fact, guess how much your family’s daily home routine will be disrupted by the painting project? Zero… because, as we mentioned earlier, you’re not even there to execute your daily home routine.
So if you’ve got a vacation coming up, give us a call, and make arrangements to come home to the most beautiful house you’ve ever seen! (Same house… just more beautiful.)
Also, to avoid injury, keep your hands and arms inside the thrill rides of life at all times.
- Where do you stay when you go to House Island? Send photos
- Does Captain Kangaroo have anything whatsoever to do with your daily home routine?
- Would you like to return from vacation to the most beautiful house your house could possibly be?
Send your answers to email@example.com
(* Prize is at the sole discretion of Doug Imhoff, his heirs and assigns, and the House Manager. Oops, the House Manager is on vacation. Maybe we’ll get the Speaker of the House. Ha ha, that’s a little quip, of course: We never let the House Manager go on vacation. This month’s Top Prize may or may not be an all-expenses-paid vacation on House Island… this may depend on the exact location, and actual existence, of a House Island. Deadline for entries is the day before vacation, which you know will be monstrously busy, so if we were you we’d jump on this right away. Boring, lackluster, or unimaginative entries will be thrown off the top of the thrill ride of life, to meet with certain destruction, not to mention disdain and ridicule. So please, don’t let that happen. Good luck!)
Don’t forget: With Imhoff Fine Residential Painting, you always get more than a high-quality paint job… you get an enjoyable experience we hope you’ll treasure. We’re passionate about our customers and their properties… we’re a “painting family,” and we treat your project like family, too! Check us out online. It’s one of the great thrill rides of our life when we read the many enthusiastic five-star reviews our clients have shared on Google, Yelp, and elsewhere. And we can’t wait to earn our next outstanding review from you!
Know anybody who could use a smile… or perhaps a GREAT painting experience?
Please forward The Painter’s Rag their way!