NOW Is The Time…
… To Give Your Home A Fresh Coat Of LOVE!
The Painter’s Rag:
Monthly Wit And Wisdom
From Your Friendly And Professional Fine Painting Company
With all the rankings and “top ten” lists that come with this time of year (sports rankings,
political polls, your kid’s report card, etc.), the last thing you need is one more list. Am I right?
So here it is!
The Top Ten Reasons
NOW Is The Best Time
To Have Your House Painted!
- The wall in the dining room is pretty dinged-up from all the chairs that have been
inadvertently whacked against it over the past couple of years.
- You can get an awesome deal, including a nifty discount, on your home’s fresh coat of LOVE
if you call Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company during the slow winter months.
- You overheard those two gossipy holiday party guests whispering about how bad your living
room was looking, especially with those stains you were trying to hide, but didn’t quite hide,
behind the oddly-placed knick-knack shelf. They quickly claimed they were talking about
somebody else’s house, but you know what you heard.
- Our painters are so bored this time of year that some of them are taking cooking classes, but
while they’re awesomely talented at painting, their attempts to create even a remotely-edible coq
au vin have fallen meaningfully short. So to keep them busy at something that gives them a
sense of accomplishment and strong self-worth, we give a nice discount for winter projects.
- You’ve grown pretty tired of hearing your spouse mumbling about needing to get the kitchen
cabinets re-stained before the folks visit again, which could happen any weekend now.
- Your home painting project will cost you less if you call Imhoff Fine Residential Painting
Company during what some people call “the winter doldrums.” It’ll also be easier to schedule at
your convenience, since we would love to immediately dispatch a crew of talented, expert, and
attractive painters to your home before they cook again.
- You’re really looking forward to your two-week ski vacation in Telluride… but you’re really
NOT looking forward to coming home to those scratched and smudged walls, especially the
walls in the front hallway, which of course is the first thing people see when they come into the
house… and you recently realized, probably because you read it in The Painter’s Rag, that the
talented, expert, and highly-attractive painters from Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company
can actually give your home a fresh coat of LOVE while you’re off on vacation, trying not to break any bones and going to dinner at that one great restaurant where they really DO know how
to make a tasty coq au vin.
- The painting business is a little slower during the winter months, so you can get a great
discount by booking your winter painting project with your friends at Imhoff Fine Residential
- If you have to look at that scuffed-up stairway banister ONE MORE TIME…
… And the Number One reason this is the perfect time to book your painting project now, during
our slower season, is that now is our slower season, and you can get a nifty discount and a
Now, if those aren’t reasons enough to schedule your home’s fresh coat of LOVE by calling
Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company TODAY, by all means, let us know, and we’ll make
up another list of reasons and get it right off to you! We have time.
But if you’re ready for that fresh coat of love, take a moment to check out the many fawning
five-star reviews our customers have taken the time to post online for us, then give us a call.
We have a list of the top ten reasons we want to paint your home during the slow winter months.
And all ten of those reasons are that we can’t wait to earn our next great review from you!
1. What’s your favorite place to get coq au vin in Telluride?
2. When the folks visit, what are the chances you can keep Mom out of the kitchen and
away from those yucky-looking cabinets?
3. Are you ready for a fresh coat of LOVE at your place, with a whopping 15% discount on
most projects since it’s our slow season, which we may have failed to mention in the
main body of the newsletter?
Send your answers to firstname.lastname@example.org … The most clever, creative responses
will be eligible to WIN A PRIZE! *
(* Prize is at the sole discretion of Doug Imhoff, his heirs and assigns, and a select committee of
food critics and gossipy party guests. This is a pretty judgy committee, obviously, so you’ll need
to send in a pretty boffo entry to impress them. And even if they’re impressed, they won’t show
it. Sheesh. Judgy people. Am I right? This month’s Grand Prize is cooler than the ice that
sometimes forms at the bottom of the Kant Mak’M double diamond run in Telluride. And even if
you don’t win the Grand Prize, you still get the 15% discount – some restrictions apply, but
frankly, not that many restrictions. We’re not so busy this time of year that we have to slap a lot
of freakin’ restrictions on our discounts. Deadline is approaching. Boring, lackluster, or unimaginative entries will be force-fed leftovers from our cooking class, which would not be as
pleasurable as you might think. So send in your best work! Good luck!)
Don’t forget: With Imhoff Fine Residential Painting, you always get more than a high-quality paint job… you get an enjoyable experience we hope you’ll treasure. We’re passionate about our customers and their properties… we’re a “painting family,” and we treat your project like family, too! Check us out online. We just dream of reading the many enthusiastic five-star reviews our clients have shared on Google, Yelp, and elsewhere. And we can’t wait to earn our next outstanding review from you!
Know anybody who could use a smile… or perhaps a GREAT painting experience?
Please forward The Painter’s Rag their way!