Imhoff: The Very MODEL Of Fine Painting And Staining
And, In Fact, The Experts In Light RE-Modeling, Too!
The Painter’s Rag:
Monthly Wit And Wisdom
From Your Friendly And Professional Fine Painting Company
By now, of course, you know that Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company is the very model of excellence in painting and staining.
(If not, please send for back issues of The Painter’s Rag, available free-of-charge.)
But what you might NOT know, other than who – (who?) – who wrote the Book of Love, is that your Imhoff crew can also do an excellent, expert job with your light remodeling needs.
Just a few examples which leap readily to mind:
We were recently asked if we could help with a fake-wood door which featured stain so faded it was reminiscent of Neil Diamond’s vocal range (especially anything above about an A below Middle C). We could re-stain the door… but better, we can replace worn-out old doors with beautiful NEW doors that will look good even longer than your average pop singer can, whether or not s/he is re-stained.
Speaking of calls we recently received, 1990 called, and it wants its balusters back. That’s okay! We can install lovely NEW iron balusters, and even renovate your staircase while we’re at it!
What gets splashed behind your sink when you’re doing the dishes? (For us, it’s usually bacon grease combined with a name-brand dishwashing liquid which does not, in fact, get grease out of your way, unless they mean that splashing it behind the sink gets it out of your way. Just saying.) How about a new splash of beauty with a fantastic new tile backsplash? We can hook you up.
Your baseboards and door trim take a lot of abuse, and they rarely complain. But we can install new baseboard and door trim that will give your home or place of business a look that says “Hey, if you’re a piece of our property that complains, we can and will replace you.” That, or it will just create a beautiful new appearance you’ll be proud of.
Last time we were there, we distinctly heard your powder-room weeping because you always keep the door closed… which you do because your powder-room bath is a hideous mess. We can help you fix that.
Even new cabinets for your laundry room! As much time as you spend there, don’t you want to be surrounded by beauty and quality?
… And if you need some light remodeling that isn’t mentioned here, give us a call, and we’ll definitely mention it.
In fact, we can probably take care of it for you!
It’s not uncommon for property owners to want to improve their digs by having things remodeled a bit, and then possibly re-painted or re-stained. How cool that YOU know a firm (hint: it’s us) which can do all of those things and more? Without requiring you to get on the schedule of different companies who specialize in different parts of the job?
We recently transformed an office nook by demolishing and hauling off some ghastly old built-in drawers and countertops, stripping off the “original” (code for “old”) nasty wallpaper, and putting an attractive fresh coat of paint on the whole area.
All in a couple of days!
So don’t put off that project any longer. Call the pros at Imhoff Fine Residential Painting Company, and see how quick and convenient (and value-based) your transformation project can be when it’s all handled by the same crew.
Say goodbye to whining door trim and wailing powder-rooms.
- Have you recently received calls from 1990, or any other years which have been on your “Do Not Call” list? If you don’t report it, we can’t help you.
- How do you get grease out of your way? (A clue: the answer is not to paint over it)
- What’s that project you’ve been putting off which, if we can take care of it for you, would put a smile on your face and a new happiness in your upcoming holiday season?
Send your answers to email@example.com
(* Prize is at the sole discretion of Doug Imhoff, and his decision will be final, though possibly subject to light remodeling. All entries must be received by 1990 or later. If you had any idea what this month’s prize is, you’d be amazed, and you’d also be well-served to call Doug up and let him know what it was so he wouldn’t have to figure it out… Doug is a busy man, especially with Light Remodeling Season in full vigor. Did you know that September is Light Remodeling Awareness Month? Neither did we. But if it isn’t, it probably should be. To check the status of your entry, keep re-reading this month’s edition until you understand it well enough to tell everyone you meet about the amazing contents. Not valid where void. See details somewhere. Boring, lackluster, or unimaginative entries will be remodeled until they are no longer boring, lackluster, or unimaginative… otherwise they have no chance of winning, and are frankly a dark blot on your family name henceforth and forever.)
Don’t forget: With Imhoff Fine Painting, you always get more than a high-quality paint job… you get an enjoyable experience we hope you’ll treasure. We’re passionate about our customers and their properties… we’re a “painting family,” and we treat your project like family, too! Check us out online. We’re delighted by the many enthusiastic five-star reviews our clients have shared on Google, Yelp, and elsewhere. And we can’t wait to earn our next outstanding review from you!
Know anybody who could use a smile… or perhaps a GREAT painting experience?
Please forward The Painter’s Rag their way!